How to talk to your mom about weed - Mother’s Day Blog

Some of us have really cool parents - the ones you could be honest with about your pot consumption right from the start, who you maybe have shared a joint with in the past and are overall very chill about cannabis. If this is you, you’re a lucky mf because the reality is, many of us tokers live on the other side of the fence. Our parents think pot is the devil’s lettuce and it feels like there is no convincing them. Well, for this Mother’s Day, we thought it would be a great idea to discuss some ways to try to dissolve the stigma of weed with Mom while sharing a better understanding of our favourite plant. 

Below are some ways to open the door of being honest about your weed consumption with your mom (and family). Fair warning: Before you embark on this journey, make sure you allocate a decent amount of time for this discussion as it can potentially be a lengthy one, and be sure to be well rested as this conversation may test your patience! 

Without further ado, here are the steps you should take: 

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Gather the facts

Your opinion may not hold a lot of weight in this discussion so having solid facts to back you up is always a good plan to keep in your back pocket. Don’t be afraid to dig into the history of cannabis and share how misunderstood the plant is. Some of the points we would be sure to mention are as follows:

  • No one has ever died from too much pot, PERIOD.

  • A study done in 2015 by Scientific Reports states that cannabis is 114x less deadly than alcohol

  • Cannabis was legal prior to the 1930’s - in 1850, weed was even used for medicinal purposes as it became a staple in the United States Pharmacopoeia

  • Cannabis was used across various civilizations for centuries

  • The gateway drug theory has been debunked time and time again 

  • The history of weed dictates a racist agenda that was created by the White ruling class of the time (1930’s onwards) *insert the War on Drugs spiel here*

  • A 2006 article in the Scientific American proved that long term cannabis use DOES NOT lead to lung cancer - the study found that “even those who smoked 20,000 joints in their life did not have an increased risk of cancer.”

  • Cannabis is LEGAL now - even the government doesn’t consider the plant a threat. As for the USA, 17 states have legalized by now and this number is constantly growing decriminalization 


Now that we’ve got the facts out of the way, let’s dive into how to effectively open the conversation about smoking weed with Mom.

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Reiterate your successes

Stoner movies definitely don’t help when it comes to debunking the average smoker stereotype. The stigma attached to the typical stoner has really hurt the reputation of the plant, thus boxing us all into one category: the burnout. You and I both know we are not all burnouts but this may be something you have to prove to mom to swing her weed vote. 

Start by compiling a list of all the things you’ve done in life that makes Mum proud of you. You accomplished them regardless of your lifestyle and let’s face it, pot was likely a part of your life along the way, right? Delicately share this detail - that cannabis never really took you off track and you've been a productive member of society regardless of if you choose to indulge or not. 

For parents who are completely in the dark about your consumption, this may come as a huge shock to them. Be prepared to deal with that scenario and perhaps think of ways to diffuse any tension that may come with you disclosing this secret of yours. Mentioning your daily healthy habits may be useful as it shows that you are still committed to putting yourself first (ie. reminding Mom that you still work out several times a week, you’re pulling in good grades, you have a successful career etc.) Logically deliver this message but try not to appear condescending or sarcastic as this will only increase the tension. We are trying to undo decades of cannabis stigmatization here - Rome was not built overnight!

Anecdotal Experience 

Consider WHY you smoke weed. There are likely a variety of reasons - try to speak on each of them individually and really highlight how pot reinforces your day-to-day living. Here are some of the most common reasons:

 Weed helps me:

  • sleep

  • have an appetite

  • manage my anxiety

  • deal with my pain

  • focus

  • get creative

  • moderate my mood

  • meditate 

  • socialize

  • relax, etc.

Here are 2 examples of how we would expand on some of the benefits of smoking weed:

“Smoking cannabis helps me become more creative when writing. I often experience writers’ block but I find smoking a bit of weed before I brainstorm really helps the ideas flow more.”

“I use cannabis to manage the pain I experience around my joints because I don’t want to take pills. Pills make my stomach feel sick while pot helps me continue on with my day with no side effects.”

These anecdotes are easy to come up with because they’re all true. Just lay out the logic to Mum so she can see your perspective. 

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Compare it to booze

Many stoners opt to smoke over drinking any day and this shouldn't be left out of your argument. There’s a reason you prefer smoking to drinking and maybe this is a great time to explain some of the negative repercussions that come from alcohol binging. Does Mom know that alcohol is a leading cause of death as ~95,000 Americans die yearly from alcohol-related causes? Maybe she’d be surprised to learn that alcohol contributes to about 18.5 percent of ED visits. These numbers are staggering. And how often do we hear about cannabis-related ED visits? 

*crickets*

Yeah, that’s what we thought. Explain why booze isn’t your vibe the way pot is. Be weary of potential backlash from your parents on this note, especially if they themselves are drinkers. Sometimes it’s difficult to face the facts when we all hold our own personal biases, but stand tall in your argument while remaining calm. You are opening this conversation because you care about maintaining a positive relationship with your folks. Perhaps this is your way of extending an olive branch to them - make this known!

Appear educated on the topic

While it may be easy to defend all the great reasons for why pot is in our lives, it’s important to make it known that you are aware of any possible risks associated with cannabis. As you outwardly acknowledge that you are aware of the harms of smoking and driving, for example, you appear as a mature, educated smoker. You’re not trying to act a fool with pot. This is what gives dank a bad rep and we’re really trying to move away from that age old notion. Weed has grown up and so have you and your consumption. Show your mom that you’re responsible and she’ll see that you’ve done your research and that you’re not a dipsh*t.

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The Final Stretch

At this point, you’ve delivered all the key points you can to sway Mom to the green side. If this conversation has gone well thus far, don’t be shy to mention the medicinal benefits of CBD and THC. If you think it would help, bringing in a jar of a CBD topical for her to try may be a nice way to bridge the gap between curiosity and the unknown. Definitely emphasize that CBD is not psychoactive to the mum who insists she is not trying to get high. If she can find value in the plant from the medicinal side of the spectrum, maybe she’ll be more understanding of you consuming it.

If the conversation has not gone over well, don’t sweat it. You did what you could to try to be honest and maybe they just need some time to mull all this over. If the situation got heated at any point, know when the best time to take a step back is and dismiss yourself, if need be. The goal of this is to open up conversation - if it all leads to screaming, yelling, etc, just know that you are not alone. It’s difficult to change the paradigm of others that has been compounding for decades. These things take time. Screaming back “IT’S JUST A PLANT!” won’t get you anywhere - trust us. Take a moment to step back and recollect. Hopefully, if anything comes of the conversation, you’ll feel a bit of a weight taken off your shoulders for finally being able to be honest for once. 

Either way, best of luck as you journey into this pursuit. Be kind to yourself and give your mamma lots of love this Mother’s Day because she really does just care about your well being after all. 

Kamal